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Joke of the Day

"To determine how safe a neighborhood is, divide the number of white women carrying yoga mats by the number of signs saying 'Checks Cashed'"

"A man walks into a brothel.. The attendant behind the desk says ""Beat it. We're closed""."

"Only 30's kids will get this... Jesus."

"Don't have phone sex! You might get hearing aids."

"The people you may know list should be renamed to, the people you may want to block."

"The girl working at Best Buy saw me checking her out. She walked up and asked me ""Do you need help?"" I replied ""No, I am just looking."""

"[first date] Me: You into role playing? Her: Kinky, what do you have in mind? Me: You fake a heart attack and we get our meal for free."

"Two penguins are in the shower The first penguin turns to the other and says, ""Hey, pass the soap, please."" The second one replies, ""What do I look like? A typewriter?"""

"What do you call a slutty egg? Over easy!"

"What did Wendy do when she first saw Captain Hook? She Peedherpants"