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Joke of the Day

"What is ISIS's favorite kind of coffee? Decapitated"

"How do u confuse a blonde Tell them to pee in the corner of a silo"

"If you're feeling lonely, dim the lights and watch a good horror movie. By the end of it, you won't feel like you're alone anymore."

"I've been single so long I deserve a bachelors degree"

"[tv announcer] Are you bloated? Tired? Unable to enjoy the activities you once loved? [me with mouthful of chips] YEAH"

"Why did Chris Christie endorse Donald Trump? Christie wants the highest cabinet position possible because he knows - the higher cabinet is where they keep all the cookies!"

"Why is Santa's sack so large? He only comes once a year."

"Hear about the new book that teaches both reading and STD prevention? It's called See Dick Run."

"We have 20 people coming over to our house today, so my wife made me clean all week She's terrified someone will find out people live here."

"I'm having an out of money experience."