209913

Joke of the Day

"So the human cannonball decided to quit his job at the circus... The ringmaster said ""Please, no you can't! We'll never be able to find another man of your caliber!"""

"Why did the hipster die? He thought breathing was too mainstream"

"It's fine to eat chicken with skin but serve beef with skin and everybody just starts freaking out."

"Problem gambling? Bet you can't quit."

"It must have been pretty easy for The Beatles to say ""All You Need is Love"" since they were fucking millionaires."

"I was asked to give a talk about ignorance... ...but I don't know anything about it."

"This morning I found a fly on my toilet seat. ... It was pissed off."

"What happened when the Easter Bunny caught his head in the fan? It took ears off his life!"

"People in Arab nations are still wondering what all the western world hub bub about hump day and camel toe is about."

"Tip: if you often say things like ""there is no i in team but there *is* one in incompetence"" they won't ask you to mentor new coworkers."