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Joke of the Day
"I don't need pepper spray to stop a mugger, I just open my wallet and blow the dust in their eyes."
Next Joke
"What'll happen if a piano is dropped on a man? He will B flat"
"Getting a caricature drawing of yourself is basically the only time you pay money for someone to brutally own you."
"Doc : Do you know what blood type you are? Me : Red?"
"All these phone companies advertising for ""More lines, more savings!"" But when I do more lines my savings go to shit."
"Microsoft has realized that all their products get better PR by naming it after Halo mythology. I'm expecting the next Windows version to be Windows 117."
"""For my next illusion"" the magician announces: ""Free will!"" Everyone starts clapping but they don't know why"
"No thanks, Party Casino; if I wanted to gamble when watching porn, I'd start the video with the volume on full and my door wide open."
"I heard Christians only count 1 through 9. I wonder what happens if they say 10?"
"Sometimes when i don't want my wife to find something I Put it in her purse"