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Joke of the Day

"I've never run a marathon, but once I walked real fast across a parking lot because Krispy Kreme was about to close."

"I don't like people call me fatty I like people call me to eat."

"I'm romantic so I treat my girlfriend to a candlelight dinner every night, plus she's getting fat and candlelight has like zero calories."

"Since Walking Dead isn't on I've hid pot from my stoner friends. As they amble around looking for it I'm shooting them with paint ball guns."

"A black guy called me a disgrace in front of his girlfriend, but then I realized he was introducing me to his girlfriend Grace."

"A Clock wrote a book Critics say its about time"

"I'm not racist, I have black friends. Or at least I did until my dad sold them."

"Why do mermaids wear seashells? Because the B shells are too small and the D shells are too big!"

"Decided to start a business that serves beer and gives massages Gonna call it Rub and Chug"

"Bad puns are the best puns How can you tell that a baker's hands are on fire? He can't seem to *stop droppin' rolls*."