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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my dick into your mouth."

"It looks like I'm missing a lot of tweets. They were probably so great the Library of Congress just couldn't wait to archive them."

"My salad for lunch is missing one key ingredient which would make it perfect. Donuts."

"What are Hillary Clinton's favorite shoes? Platform Flip flops !"

"If you are willing to jump off a bridge, because your wife cheated on you... ...just remember it is a pair of horns, and not a pair of wings."

"What's the best thing to come out of a penis? The wrinkles."

"Q. What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name? A. You didn't hold the pillow down long enough."

"Q: What do you call Italian women in a sauna? A: Gorillas In The Mist!"

"A guy is lying on a field. There's a backpack lying on his back, and a lot of flies are flying around. What's in the backpack? A parachute."

"Trading gold for a good consulting / corporate or office joke... Guys, it's been a long day, I need a laugh and I've got three months of gold to give away. Help me out?"