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Joke of the Day

"Q. What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name? A. You didn't hold the pillow down long enough."

"My penis was in the Guinness Book of World Records Until they kicked me out of the library"

"Im finally using reddit how it was meant to be used And ive run out of toilet paper"

"you are what you eat.. funny, I dont rember eating a sexy beast this morning."

"What do you call a mouse that can pick up a monster? Sir."

"What do you call a group of students? A school."

"And He said unto Mike, ""Come forth and have eternal life."" But Mike came fifth, and won a blender."

"I was thinking of telling you guys a gay joke. Butt fuck it..."

"I went to the doctor with severe constipation, he laughed as he took my urine sample. I think he's taking the piss but I still couldn't give a shit."

"Did you hear about the dyslexic racist? He hated gingers."