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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a blue 7 and a red 4? 3, duh. (My ex's 9 year old little sister told me this joke, and followed is up with: ""and YOU'RE the math guy!"" >_< Burned.)"

"I got together with a pig and... I think she's my Sowmate. ( ^ @ ^ )"

"Just walked by the place I had brunch last weekend and one of my friends is still sitting there talking about herself"

"Man arrested on charges of being nice, quiet guy. ""I'm shocked, he always seemed like such a murderous asshole,"" said a neighbor."

"Why did the tomato blush? He saw the salad dressing"

"Past, Present and Future walk into a bar It was tense"

"Where does the thick, creamy dressing go when it gets sick? The Mayo Clinic."

"LPT: Don't waste a bit more money for the brand-name bleach; it isn't any different than the bargain brand They taste exactly the same"

"What did the Italian say when 6 curses were removed from him? Hexagon."

"If I had a pound for every time i misunderstood an expression... I'd way a fucking ton!"