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Joke of the Day
"What's the best part of being an abortion doctor? The free lunch."
Next Joke
"Someone needs to open a bar called ""The Gym"". Then I too can be annoying on Facebook by posting how I'm always at the gym."
"So two astronauts walk into a club on the moon... One says to the other, ""Let's bounce, this place has no atmosphere"""
"Doctor, doctor, there's a hairless military strategist on my head! Ah yes, looks like male Patton baldness."
"Lipstick Why is it called lipstick if you can still move your lips?"
"After I clear my browser history I do a quick google search for things like ""feeding the hungry"" and ""How to thank a loving wife"""
"What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust Worse*"
"The only highlight of a brutal moving day: Wife: ""That's way too big to fit in the back door."" 4 people in unison: ""That's what she said!"""
"My wife is all, ""we love each other so much we finish each other's sentences,"" until it comes to a prison sentence."
"*Fakes Phone Call* ""Yes a thousand doves please....well give me pigeons and i can paint them white"" (cups hand over phone) ""I plan weddings"""