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Joke of the Day

"What is the only alcoholic beverage Muslim extremists are permitted to drink? Smirnoff ISIS"

"Q:What did The Banana Say To the Vibrator? A:Why the fuck are you shaking, she's going to eat me!"

"I grew up thinking my dad was a fireman Then I realised he was just an arsonist"

"Maybe don't name your musical ""Rent"" if you don't even have songs that discuss real estate or leasing procedures. 0/10, very disappointing."

"Captain America: ok Avengers, we can defeat Ultron if we work as a team. Remember, no man is an island Island Man: oh come on not this again"

"Who laughs the last? The one who you have to explain the joke to."

"CBostonC CMarathonC Don't look at me like I'm the first person to add C4 to the Boston Marathon."

"If you start peeing out blood Urine big trouble"

"Her: Do I look fat? Him: Do I look stupid?..."

"Where do porn actresses wait for their turn in a baseball themed orgy? The on-dick circle of course."