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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a cactus and a schoolbus? Cactus has little pricks on the outside"

"I always try to hold in my sneezes so I don't give someone a reason to talk to me"

"Are you made of copper and tellurium? Because you're CuTe"

"*Interrogation room w/ murderer* I'd start talking, my partner isn't so nice... *From under the table I raise a puppet dressed as a cop*"

"Why do hunters close one eye when they aim? Because they can't see if they close both."

"TIFU getting fired from the calendar factory All I did was take a day off."

"Maybe it's the LSD talking but I am the walrus goo goo goo joob."

"I just found a jar in the fridge, with expiry date 21/12/2012. I looked at it twice, and indeed, it was mayannaise!"

"pulled over drunk driving office: please recite the alphabet from z to a me: z y u a k m e"

"What's a gay guy's favorite news station? The BBC."