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Joke of the Day

"I wish I drove a Volkswagen bug. It would be cool to know that every time I drove by a school bus, some kid was getting punched."

"I'm not saying he's a gold digger, but he certainly did not hold back when I took him through the McDonald's drive thru."

"Why didn't JFK ever like vodka? Because he couldn't handle a few shots"

"the reason i dont wear specific colors on 9/11 when someone asks me why im not wearing red on 9/11 i tell them ""because im not celebrating a muslim holiday"""

"A box full of leak detection fluid leaked all over the inside of a trailer this morning. Well, at least it worked."

"The gardener asked me what I wanted him to do, I told him to water the plants... He points and asks ""water these?"", I said ""nah man, *pointing* WATER THOSE""."

"Top 3 things you want to do to avoid writing a clickbait title Number 2 will shock you!"

"Winter's coming so I'm knitting you a muffler. What size is your mouth?"

"Your Mom: Over 10,000,000,000 Served"

"Engineering joke At work today I told an engineer I liked the cool shapes in his design. ""Oh, it's not intentional,"" he responded. ""It's mostly in compression."""