158364

Joke of the Day

"the reason i dont wear specific colors on 9/11 when someone asks me why im not wearing red on 9/11 i tell them ""because im not celebrating a muslim holiday"""

"Want to hear a joke about sodium hypobromite? NaBrO!!"

"Texas - A man convicted of robbery worked out a deal to pay $9,600 in damages rather than serving a prison sentence. He gave the court a check--a forged check. He was sentenced to ten years."

"How do you know your gf is getting fat? She starts fitting in your wife's clothes..."

"Dyslexic Superbowl watchers were probably disappointed when they saw football instead of a superb owl."

"DAE ever wonder if Andy would be disappointed in OP for not delivering? I went for corny."

"""Men, we need a durable lunch meat that can also be used as a hockey puck."" - makers of Spam."

"It's easier to compliment a woman when you're traveling with a toddler. ""Son, say hi to the beautiful lady with the piercing green eyes."""

"*petting a dog* So how long have you been blind, officer? *gets arrested*"

"if you ever wanna impress a girl just bring a baby on your date and then basically just outperform the baby at everything it's really easy"