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Joke of the Day

"*i get chased into a dark alley* Please no *two men walk up to me holding a knife* ""If you join our insurance you can save up to-"" NOOOOOOO"

"A man walks into a bar Ouch!"

"Is Vanilla Ice's son named Vanilla Extract? Cuz he should be."

"I'm on a whisky diet. I've lost three days already."

"So, hear about the 2 Muslims in a speedboat who broke through the Thames barrier? They rammed a dam"

"If you post BDSM jokes on /r/jokes.... Does it count as a submission?"

"What do you call it when a pastry kills another pastry? Game of Scones."

"They say that when you put your ear next to a vagina... You can actually *smell* the ocean!"

"What's a baby's favorite type of tea? Tit-tea"

"Me: Push! Grandkids: But, you're heavy. Me: What did the sign say? Grandkids: No children in shopping cart :(( Me: Rules are rules."