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Joke of the Day

"Law enforcement's cracking down on texting while driving, but there's no law against standing up and playing saxophone through your sunroof."

"Hey guys I know a really good Knock-Knock Joke but you have to start it."

"At least Stevie wonder was faithful, he never saw any other women during his marriage."

"I'll call it a ""smart phone"" the day I yell, ""Where's my freaking phone?!"" and it answers, ""I'm here! Under your jacket!"""

"What is a suicide bomber's biggest fear? Dying alone."

"What do you call a discount circumcision? A rip off."

"""Yes I understand that's your face, but it's also the place where I need to put my butthole."" - Cats"

"did you know there are people who hate jews who are not nazis? yeah, they.re called tenants."

"Be original. Don't just walk up to a girl in a bar. Pay bouncers to clear a path & cartwheel up to her. If rejected casually cartwheel away."

"A little drunk. Playing scrabble with my cat. Not sure who's winning cause he's eaten most of his tiles."