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Joke of the Day
"OMG you got a new boyfriend? congratulations, who is it this week?"
Next Joke
"What is Pedobear's favorite time of the day? When the big hand touches the little hand."
"Her: Why's the couch smell like pee? [Flashback to me watching The Ring alone] Me: *points at son* I think someone had another ""accident."""
"Where did the English teacher and the student fight? in the MLA boxing ring"
"What critically acclaimed movie did Zeus star in? The Godfather"
"Interviewer: [looking through file] Are you still disruptive at nap time? Me: Wow, they weren't kidding about that permanent record thing."
"We were so poor Dad could only afford to drink 3-4 nights a week."
"You speak in haiku / That is VERY attractive / Said no girl ever"
"How do you make a German Shepherd? Put him in a synagogue."
"Anyone have a good recipe for ice cubes?"