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Joke of the Day
"Last night I had an orgy on a camping trip. It was fucking in tents!"
Next Joke
"Remember when you first joined twitter and you had no idea how to RT or what favstar was and remembered what your family looked like?"
"Did you hear about the gay Irish couple... ...names were Michael Fitzpatrick, and Patrick Fitzmichael."
"If anyone breaks in, I take comfort in knowing they'll never get past the 20 pairs of shoes in the hallway."
"men prefer large boobs 9 out of 10 men prefer large boobs. The other man prefers the 9 men."
"almost hit a biker while i was texting & driving today so please you guys be careful do NOT ride bikes"
"No matter how good your raspberry body wash smells, don't be tempted to drizzle it over your ice cream. I've been burping bubbles for days."
"What do Jewish termites do for Passover? They have a cedar dinner."
"I just leave my autocorrects so people will think I'm really passionate about ducks."
"""Daddy, am I going to die someday?"" ""No, you're the only immortal being in the entire world. Goodnight, stupid."""