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Joke of the Day

"If anyone breaks in, I take comfort in knowing they'll never get past the 20 pairs of shoes in the hallway."

"What has an N, an I, two G's, an E, and an R and can be used to describe people of a certain color? GINGER."

"Not really a joke, but I thought of a way to diss three people at once. When you see someone's baby the first time, say ""so your mom did tell you how to make ugly babies"""

"'McDonalds is the biggest sponsor of the 2012 olympic games'. We've officially reached the point where satire doesn't need punchlines."

"Q. What do you instantly know about a well-dressed man? A. His wife is good at picking out clothes."

"I just took a huge shot It was quite a vowel movement!"

"WAITER: soup or salad? CLARK KENT: *sweating nervously* just a REGULAR salad for a REGULAR guy please ha ha. nothing super about it..."

"What is the biggest advantage of living in Switzerland? Well for starters the flag is a big plus."

"I'm not saying I'm batman but answer me this have you ever seen me and batman in the same room?"

"There are three kinds of people in this world... Those that can do Math, and those that can't."