201051

Joke of the Day

"Charlie Sheen is like Ash Ketchum BeBecause they both catch things"

"What's the difference between inlaws and outlaws? Outlaws are wanted!"

"Stolen Gate The other day, I looked out my window to see two guys stealing my side gate! I didn't say anything to them though. I didn't want them to take offence."

"If you have a crush on someone, walk right up to them, then a little past them and avoid them altogether it's probably not worth it."

"My brother lost his eyesight in a motorboating accident. Her nipples were pierced."

"George R.R. martins House words should be ""Book is coming"" because he keeps saying it but it never seems to actually happen."

"What is Jeffery Dahmer's favorite candy? Mentos."

"Ever hear of the Infinite Monkey Theorem? It goes something like if an infinite number of Redditors typed away on keyboards, one of them will eventually type a complete day of work."

"MOSES: Cool thinkpiece GOD: It's a list of commandments. Not everything is a thinkpiece! Jesus Christ MOSES: Who? GOD: Oops, sorry. Spoilers"

"'Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house, there was a grim recognition of the fundamental uselessness of man's endeavors."