199464

Joke of the Day

"i feel like this year's fibonacci conference will be as big as the last two combined!"

"Just received an email saying: ""Want to see Celine Dion live?"" My first thought was that it was a ransom demand."

"What's pink and red and goes 100MPH. A baby in a blender."

"Sat down to donate blood the other day Nurse: Just a little prick. Me: How'd you know?"

"Did you see the news about the Governor of Alabama's mansion burning down? Damn near took out the entire trailer park."

"Did you hear about the new Yiddish martial art... that involves rapid spasms and filing legal action against your opponent? Jew-fit-sue is taking off in a big way"

"What do you call a little Mexican child? A paragraph, because he's too short to be an essay."

"When I was single my old Aunt used to come up to me at family weddings And poke me in the ribs and say, ""you're next."" she stopped after I did the same to her at a funeral."

"I would ask you how old you are but I know you can't count that high."

"Some say Obama is the biggest liar of all time.. I say, the person who chose the spelling of, ""Colonel"" is the biggest liar of all time"