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Joke of the Day

"My 82 year old Grandpa's favorite joke A skeleton walks into a bar, sits down and says ""I'll have a beer and a mop"""

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"Having sex is like riding a bike. Specifically, like that scene in Pee-wee's Big Adventure where everyone in the world has a bike except you"
"So I was having sex with this girl.. When suddenly she asks me: ""Doesn't it bother you that I'm 13??"" So I replied: ""Not really, I've never been superstitious"""
"I'm still in disbelief that 9/11 coincidentally happened on September 11 (9/11)"
"Morning is like someone constantly whispering ""fuck you"" into your ear."
"Me: Can I dip my breadstick in your Alfredo sauce? Him: Usually it's me asking you that. 13YO: SHUT UP. STOP IT RIGHT NOW!"
"How do you stop a monster digging up your garden? Take his spade away."
"What did the robot say to the other robot as they destroyed each other? ""Nothing personal."""
"What's the worst part about 30 lawyers in a bus going over a cliff? The bus could fit 30 more lawyers."
"Knock Knock Who's there ! Bhuto ! Bhuto who ? Bhuto-n the other foot !"