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Joke of the Day

"My grandfather's favorite joke Q: How do you make a Peking Duck? A: Throw a brick at him. As my grandfather would say, ""That's as funny as a crutch."""

Next Joke
 
"I carry a magnum size condom in my purse like a modern day glass slipper. Some day my prince will come."
"I read an article saying that if you drink every day you are an alcoholic. Thank God, I only drink every night."
"Why does Barbie never get pregnant........? Because Ken came in another box"
"going to the gym to throw donuts at all the skinny people"
"Officer: ""didn't you know that sleeping in your car on the side of the road is illegal ?"" Me: ""yes I did officer. But this isn't my car"""
"What's the difference between jelly & jam? I can't jelly my dick down your throat"
"From my 6 year old: Where do good bees live? A bee-have"
"I'm finishing off this bottle of wine because you never know when an asteroid is gonna hit and I'd hate to waste the $6.49 I spent on it."
"how did the hipster burn his tongue? He sipped his coffee before it was cool"