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Joke of the Day

"Why do women die from suicide five times less than men? Because they can't climb high enough on the corporate ladder."

"I will die one day at a Del Taco, shot dead by a SWAT team after taking several hostages over what I feel is the meaning of extra cheese."

"I've never been a great salesman I'll tell you that for free"

"White people colonized 34 of the world looking for spices and they still can't season their food right."

"Do you have 11 protons? Cause your sodium fine."

"What's the last thing that goes through a bug's mind when it hits your windshield? It's ass"

"What are crisp like milk and go 'eek eek eek' when you eat them ? Mice Krispies !"

"Do you know what looks funny? s p o u ,no u p no"

"What would the news headline be if virginity could be restored? Unfucking Believable?"

"You can tell a lot about a person based on what they use as a gender-neutral singular pronoun."