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Joke of the Day

"#Parenthood Throwing a ball to a two year old is like....well...playing ""throw a ball and go get it yourself""...."

"I like to squat down, wrap my arms around my knees, and lean forward. That's how I roll..."

"Why are all castles disabled? They all have tur-rets"

"Hi, 911? I see someone from high school in this coffee shop and they're the type to corner & chat me up and I don't know what to do HI LAURA"

"What did the Buffalo say to his little boy when he dropped him off at school? Bison."

"Boss: Why did you call off yesterday? Me: You said I should do what's best for the company. Boss.... Me: I'll take that promotion now."

"CW: I think you're two-faced Me: Why don't you say that to my face CW: I just did! Me: No. My other face."

"How do Germans tie there shoes? With little Nazis."

"What do pigs do on nice afternoons? They go on pignics."

"Why do parents feel the need to hold your phone when you show them a picture?"