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Joke of the Day

"I hate when kangaroos say they're going to ""hop in the shower"" and expect you to laugh like you've never heard it before."

"Did you hear about the kidnapping down the street? His mother wouldn'twake him until 3."

"Please don't make fun of the Holocaust My grandfather died by falling off the guard tower Edit: Spelling"

"A Mexican magician says that he can disappear on the count of three. ""Uno, dos..."", he says before he was suddenly gone. He disappeared without a tres."

"What do you call a cat wearing shoes ? Puss in boots !"

"My eyesight is so bad that, after I took my contacts out last night, I chatted to my cat for 5 mins before I realised it was my handbag."

"The US Treasury is not going to put a woman on the $10 bill... they're going to put a woman on the new $7.80 bill."

"I recently learned how to suck my own dick... Sorry if I sound full of myself."

"I have a superiority complex It's literally my ONLY flaw."

"What do you call a can after it completes college? A graduated cylinder."