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Joke of the Day

"Nothing beats a woman with a great voice. Except Chris Brown."

"I bought a CD of ice cream van music. Now I drive with the stereo on full blast, watching the disappointment on all the little kids faces.."

"Skinny Jeans All jeans are skinny jeans if you're fat enough."

"Someone once said, there's safety in numbers.... Tell that to 6million Jews.. And a four man SS-squad."

"Let me get this straight Hulu Plus. I pay you $ to watch shows & then you fill those shows with commercials. This sounds familiar."

"Trainer: OK this week we are cutting carbs. Me: Wait, what - even macaroni & cheese? Trainer: Ya. Me: ...I think we should see other people."

"A 65 year old actress with early Alzhiemer's got a Botox shot, and later regretted it. She couldn't remember her lines."

"What emits a monochromatic beam of salty snack food? Frito Layser."

"I would tell a joke about sex... but none of you will get it."

"Sex_al Harass_ _nt All that's missing is ""u"" and ""me""."