197716

Joke of the Day

"I have a new Obama joke, but... not many people approve."

"To the women who keeps waking me up at 3AM by pounding on my door: I'm not letting you out."

"Reese Witherspoon was hit by a car in Los Angeles this morning. To be fair, the driver had just watched Four Christmases."

"Knock knock! 'Who's there?' 'To' 'To who' '*to whom' 'Kill yourself'"

"My girlfriend reminds me of Chernobyl... There's nuclear fallout when she over-reacts!"

"Why is it called PMS? Because Mad Cow Disease was already taken."

"A mom hassles her son to take out the garbage. the boys says ""sheesh, mom you tell me to do that at least once a week!"""

"What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? I don't cry when I'm cutting up the hooker"

"A week before Abraham Lincoln was shot he was in Monroe, Maryland... A week before Kennedy was shot he was in Marilyn Monroe."

"Why did the pregnant woman love to tell jokes? Because she had a pun in the oven!"