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Joke of the Day

"Doctor Doctor my son has swallowed my pen what should I do? Use a pencil till I get there"

"Why is ten afraid of nine? Because nine ate seven! *heh heh*"

"How does an octopus go to war ? Well-armed !"

"What happens when you drop a whale on thin ice? It breaks the ice...Hi, i'm (insert name)"

"So I told my girlfriend I had a job in a bowling alley She said ""Tenpin?"" I said, ""No, it's a permanent job."" - Tim Vine, King of the one liners."

"Billions of years from now, Star Jones will expand and collapse in a brilliant explosion of cosmic matter and become Black Hole Jones."

"I hate when people use words without knowing the meaning...gives me a huge hysterectomy on the side of my head."

"(NSFW) I made my girl so wet last night... ...that bitch is STILL crying..."

"what did one prick say to the other prick? nothing they were both stuck up cunts"

"[NSFW] Why does a walrus love Tupperware? Because he's always looking for a tight seal."