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Joke of the Day

"The Dress Joke ""Did you hear about that blue and black dress?"" ""No, what about it?"" ""Turns out it was white and gold."" ""Oh thaaat one."""

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"Why do Jewish Men get Circumcised ...Because Jewish woman cant resist 20% OFF."
"Why is the ocean salty? Because the land doesn't wave back."
"ME: honey, it's really muggy out today WIFE: if I go outside & all our mugs are on the front lawn, I'm leaving u ME: *sips coffee from bowl*"
"Who let the docs out? Google. Google docs."
"Jackasses and Onions What do you get when you cross a Donkey and an Onion??? You get a great piece of ASS that brings a tear to your eyes!!!!"
"The annoying moment when I get comfy in bed and realize I forgot to do something."
"[batteries in my TV remote die for the first time since I bought it 4 years ago] ""Useless piece of shit."""
"Today Happy fathers day kids"
"How many jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front, 3 in the back, 6 million in the ashtray..."