197040

Joke of the Day

"What do doctors hope to see on Christmas Santa-Gauze! I'll see myself out..."

"What's the difference between a politician and a tiger? One of them is a big puss"

"What is a uppercase 'i'? Pointless."

"A husband came home with half gallon a of ice cream and asked his wife if she wanted some. ""How hard is it?"" she asked. ""About as hard as my dick,"" he replied. ""Pour me some."""

"What's the difference between a strawberry and a pencil? One's a fruit, you idiot."

"Panty-less waxed woman hanging off a bridge ""I'm gonna jump into that canoe"". Me: ""No that's your reflection""."

"Have you heard about that new program that only the living can watch? You'd have to be dead to miss it!"

"My best friend kept bragging about his expensive yacht Had to tell him to stop showboating."

"If there are 2 things I hate they're... Incomplete lists."

"My girlfriend broke up with me. I am devastated. How could you. I did everything. I surprised you with burgers every night"