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Joke of the Day
"How do sharks like their steak? Whale-done :)"
Next Joke
"According to my Fitbit I've masturbated 4 miles today"
"Why does Donald Trump dislike Bernie Sanders? Chickens tend to avoid anything with the last name ""Sanders""."
"What were the old-time gangster's last words? ""Who put this fucking violin in my violin case?!"""
"What do people do when a chemist dies? They barium."
"When asked, 'Are you Twittering?' if I'm looking at my phone I now reply, 'No. I am not Twittering,' in a sort of flat monotone. And tweet."
"Why did the old lady fall in the well? Because she couldn't see that well"
"My X-gf has a really big heart. I have to give her that. She needs it, to pump all the ice water around."
"If I could be a superhero, I'd be Aluminum Man. My superpower would be foiling crime."
"I bet the guy who invented fake dog shit was upset the name ""shampoo"" was taken"