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Joke of the Day

"Why does Donald Trump dislike Bernie Sanders? Chickens tend to avoid anything with the last name ""Sanders""."

"What do you call a piece of toast on the ceiling? An Ethiopian rave."

"Have you checked on your shelves recently? You know, just to see how they're holding up?"

"Men treat women like objects. Weird men treat objects like women."

"What's Avagodro's favorite type of dip? GuacaMOLE"

"How do you catch a unique rabbit? Unique up on him. How do you catch a tame unique rabbit? Tame thing.... You unique up on him too."

"Reporter: Is there anything you can do to make people hate you more? Rodger Goodell: Coldplay is doing the Super Bowl halftime show."

"What's the best thing about fucking twenty-three year olds? There's twenty of them"

"What is the drunkest animal in Antarctica? A Pengwine. That's a /u/amanescape original. I can show myself out."

"Video games don't cause violence, they PREVENT it. Whenever I see a turtle now, I chuck it off the nearest cliff where it can't hurt anyone."