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Joke of the Day

"You have to compliment boobs like a Christmas tree If they're real, tell them they look fake. If they're fake, tell them they look real"

"if daniel day-lewis dies the doctors will hav to make extra sure he's dead. he may just be acting dead and no one woud ever kno"

"Every so often, I try to fornicate a large word into conversation, even if I'm not sure what it means."

"Do you know why God created atheists? Haha. Good one."

"What do you call a display of Australian patriotism? Stockholm Syndrome."

"What do Michael Jackson and Mervyn's have in common? They're both dead."

"How do you stop Carlos Santana from molesting your children? You put a guitar in his hands."

"How to fleas travel ? Itch hiking !"

"A man gestures to an empty parking lot... and says, ""This is all asphalt."" Then his ass says, ""Don't blame me."""

"What were Luke Skywalker's favourite model cars to play with as a kid? Toyodas"