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Joke of the Day

"How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? None. You don't need a lightbulb when you have a glass ceiling."

"When I couldn't pee once, I told my penis, ""Come on! I know urine there""."

"I got irradiated recently... I like to think it adds to my glowing personality."

"Will the new Apple car have windows? No. And it won't have a jack either."

"My girlfriend disliked my obsession with Japanese food Sushi left me."

"I've always wondered why baseball was getting bigger ...and then it hit me"

"Why is there no gang violence on the space station? Because it is a zero G environment."

"Anyone else like the holidays of other cultures? Like, I love the one where you take a bunch of presents and hide them in the attic. Or as you may know it, Anne Frank's birthday."

"I'm getting a vanity plate that reads ""B Pitt"" because I like people to be disappointed when they look at me."

"Thought about helping an old lady across the street but she prob doesnt have Facebook & wont make a post about it that goes viral so no thx"