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Joke of the Day
"I hate people who buy gym memberships just to walk on a treadmill. WALKING IS FREE."
Next Joke
"Mormon women Why do Mormon women stop having kids at 29? Because 30 is too many!"
"Q: What did Obi-Wan say to Luke at the breakfast table? A: ""Use the fork, Luke."""
"Yes it was my birthday. I'm going to start lying about my age, but say I'm older so people say how good I look for 47."
"My kids are really competing for least favorite today."
"There are 10 types of people in the world, those who understand binary and those who don't. Not mine, I just read it on a mug at work."
"Me: Can't. I'm exhausted from all the CrossFit this morning. Him: It's pronounced 'croissant' & how the hell did you eat the entire dozen?!"
"What's the difference between a smart midget... What's the difference between a smart midget and a woman with a venereal disease? Well, one's a cunning runt..."
"What do you call it when a lizard can't get it up? A reptile dysfunction"
"What has 9 arms, 7 legs, 4 heads, and 13 feet? The finish line of the Boston Marathon."