196517
Joke of the Day
"What's most jewish of all reptiles? The MOSESaur!"
Next Joke
"[walking quickly past the old lady I just held the door open for] this doesn't mean you can order before me"
"[texting my girlfriend] wyd? ""Just finished my homework"" Cool, Send a pic (; ? *gf sends a nude* Ewww wtf!! i meant of your homework!"
"What did one poop say to the other poop? You smell"
"I find the best way to deal with death is not to be the person who is dead."
"When people tell me I'm intimidating, I generally just glare at them until they take it back."
"Mini-Skirt Speech My speech today will be like a mini-skirt. Long enough to cover the essentials but short enough to hold your attention!"
"What doesn't kill you might come back to finish the job off so keep your wits about you."
"Roses are red.. Violets are blue... If Rebecca Black wins a Grammy, Kanye, you know what to do!"
"What's the difference between Santa and Tiger Woods? Santa stops at three ho's"