196517

Joke of the Day

"What's most jewish of all reptiles? The MOSESaur!"

"Why I'm leaving /r/jokes I have to go to work. I'll be back later."

"Blonde Joke of the day Two blondes fell down a hole. One said, ""It's dark in here isn't it?"" The other replied, ""I don't know; I can't see."" :-D"

"Why are you stuffing all that Easter candy into your mouth?"" ""Because it doesn't taste as good if I stuff it in my ears."""

"Forgive me Twitter, for I have sinned. It has been four days since my last tweet. Because, you know... weed and Sudoku."

"Dentist: ""You need a crown."" Patient: ""Finally someone who understands me"""

"I've been texting so much lately that I move my thumbs from side to side when I'm actually talking to someone."

"I was out walking my dog when another man with a dog approached me, picked up a stick and said 'I could throw this stick a mile away and this dog would bring it back.' 'That's a bit far fetched!'"

"Hiding the bank statement from your husband is the new hiding your report card from your parents."

"""Shake what your mama gave ya."" ""You want me to shake a $25 Macy's gift card?"""