196426

Joke of the Day

"How can you tell this joke was submitted by a woman? No, wait."

"Q: What happened to the Polish National Library? A: Someone stole the book."

"Satan: you can spend eternity in hell OR you can go to work for the first time in 5 days. Me: hmmm Satan: well? Me: IM THINKING, DAMN IT"

"Have you heard about these new Oak woord, gold-finished coffins? Apparently they're to die for."

"You can learn a lot about your kids by simply turning off the TV and talking. For example I discovered that mine are really boring."

"holy crap a guy actually gave me his number and i didn't know what to do so i panicked and sent him a picture of a dead bird?"

"I should buy a 26.2 sticker! for my nose..."

"How do you get rid of a fat ghost? Exorcise it."

"My friend just told me I don't know how to make jokes. That's shit because I once sent ten of my puns to an online contest. No, they didn't make it to the finals... No pun in ten did."

"I've been reading a book on euthanasia... It's so good I can't put it down."