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Joke of the Day

"What do Americans do immediately after winning the World Cup (Soccer)? Turn off the Playstation."

"What do hemophiliacs and virgins have in common? One prick...and it's all over."

"Q: What's the difference between a cello and a violin? A: A cello burns longer."

"Mcdonalds will be serving a new burger which you cant touch. Its called the Mchammer."

"Why did the muscle miss class? ...because it wasn't a-tendon!"

"How many hipsters does it take to change a light bulb? It's like a really obscure number you have probably never heard of."

"What do you call an unborn child that is excessively ready to accept failure? A defetus"

"[watches you eat my bday cake] ""I've poisoned that."" ""Haha very [clasps chest & begins panting] w-with what?"" [leans in & winks] ""Poison."""

"What is feared by jailbirds and splits light into different colors? Prism rape."

"How many absurdists does it take to change a lightbulb? Yarn."