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Joke of the Day

"I was in a cab today and the cab driver said, ""I love my job, I'm my own boss. Nobody tells me what to do..."" Then I said, ""turn left."""

Next Joke
 
"A man walks into a library asking for a book... A man walks into a library asking for a book on how to commit suicide. The librarian replies, ""Fuck off, you won't return it."""
"Meeting new people and trying my best to act all sunglasses emoji."
"What do you call a chicken looking at lettuce? Chicken caesar salad"
"What does Bill Cosby put in his garden? Rapeseeds."
"2 Irishmen in a helicopter..... One turns to the other and says ""Dew tink if oi turned this here choppa upside down we'll fall out""? ""Don't talk daft, we'll always be friends"""
"How do you know when a hiptser is a good secret agent? You've never heard of him."
"If you think you're bad with words, imagine the first guy to say ""There there"" when consoling someone"
"If a girl stabbed me on our first date, how many days should I wait to ask her out again?"
"What did the Kiwi say to the Jew? Hee broo"
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