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Joke of the Day

"My ex broke up with me because she wanted a man with a 9inch penis :(... ... and there was no way I was cutting two inches off."

"If you have to wait a while to get a fast food order, say, ""I thought this was FAST food."" The place will never recover from that mega burn"

"What do you call a dad balloon that disappears? Pops"

"Argario make me like a pornstar... First I'm say I'm going to eat all the balls. Then I scream THAT'S THE LARGEST THING I'VE EVER SEEN!!!"

"What did the two story house say to its friend after it had just finished working out, and it's friend invited I to a party? I'm two tiered. I came up with this at 1am, enjoy."

"Did you know Robert E. Lee was an honor student in high school? He was also voted most likely to secede."

"I've been waking up with a headache for years Unfortunately I'm married to it."

"Whats the difference between a zippo and a hippo? One is really heavy, and the other is a little lighter."

"No, I don't need a bag; I'm gonna juggle this 12 pack, this bag of ice and this whole roasted chicken on my unicycle while whistling Dixie."

"The average fight between men lasts 3 minutes. The average fight between women lasts 17 years."