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Joke of the Day

"Kanye's daughter's first hit single. . . North by North West"

"Why is the hipster sweating? Because he wore a scarf before it was cool."

"I thought about another woman while having sex with my wife so to make up for it... I thought of my wife while having sex with another woman."

"You'd think this moron wandering around the lot would give up after 10 minutes and push the alarm button to find their car ... But I won't."

"My girlfriend and I are both feminists But I'm better since I'm a guy"

"An archaeologist notices his partner appears to be nibbling a fossil... Curious, he walks over and asks, ""What you got there?"" ""Not sure"", replies the fellow, ""But you have got to try-a-lil'-bite!"""

"HIM: If you're upset that people think you're weird, have you tried being less weird? ME: [eating ice cream with chopsticks] Yes."

"Why did the teacher have her hair in a bun? Because she had her nose in a hamburger."

"*pets your eyebrows* there, there caterpillar; everything will be ok"

"Which burger is famous for a long nose? Cyrano de Burgerac!"