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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between me and a pile of bricks? The bricks will get laid."

"Will you come to my party on Saturday? Yes please What's the address? 25 The High Street. Just push the bell with your elbow. Why with my elbow? Well you won't be empty-handed will you!"

"A teenage boy asks his granny: 'Have you seen my pills, they are labelled LSD? Granny: ""Fuck the pills; have you seen the dragons in the kitchen?"""

"A time traveler. Knock knock. Who's there?"

"Moby jumped over a mountain.... of air. . . . . . . What did you expect?"

"I Swear, These Jell-o Products Just Keep Getting Worse... It's almost like they're pudding in less effort. I'll see myself out."

"My professor asked me to give an example of a word whose definition got reversed. I literally had no answer."

"New Coworker: So do you have any kids? Me: Yeah, one too many New Coworker: Haha, oh yeah? How many do you have? Me: One"

"My lame RPG joke. What do you call a thief with steel armor? A stealer!!!!!"

"Sardar to his servant: Go and water the plants. Servant: It's already raining. Sardar: So what take an umbrella and go."