194488
Joke of the Day
"""My lips are sealed."" -Virgins."
Next Joke
"I'm always two drinks away from digging up my backyard to look for dinosaur bones"
"They say real women have curves. Well, then, the lady in front of me at Starbucks is a real, real, real, real, real, real, real, real woman."
"presidents day is just a holiday created by ""Big President"" to get us to buy more presidents"
"I went shopping . . . I went to the supermarket to get some groceries. When I got to the dairy section, they only had one piece of cheese left. It was provolone."
"I had the worst night last night.. The ghost of Gloria Gaynor appeared in front of my bed. At first I was afraid, then I was petrified."
"As you can tell by my wrinkled shirts, I'm bad at irony."
"The jury found me guilty. I asked the judge what the punishment would be, and he said: ""Well..."" Suspended sentence"
"Shower like nobody is watching."
"A Scotsman walks into a bar.. Normally there is a Welshman, Irishman and Englishman, but they're all in Marseille at the Euro's."