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Joke of the Day
"Nothing says' I love my dog' quite like spending more money on his haircut than you do your own."
Next Joke
"How did the obscene telephone caller get attacked by the Gorilla? He made a mistake and dialled a preyer!"
"If you ever get caught sleeping on the job... slowly raise your head and say, ""In Jesus name, amen,"""
"Press Conference: How do you respond to accusations that you over sexualize everything? Me: *slowly takes entire microphone into mouth*"
"I just opened a marketing email from Fitness magazine and my computer died laughing."
"When Microsoft and Apple ship faulty products Microsoft: We will fix that faulty battery timer through a software update. *never fixes it though* Apple: *quietly removes the battery timer*"
"How do priests make holy water? They bless the hell out of it."
"A good way to let the audience know a character doesn't ""play by the rules"" is to name her Kat."
"My doctor constantly says I'm artistic. I don't know why he keeps mispronouncing it, though"
"Hey girl, are you a pool? Cause I'd piss in YOUR deep end"