179204

Joke of the Day

"A frog is sitting on a lily pad in the middle of what is clearly a river. He shouts to a toad on the shore, ""Hey, look at me, I'm on a lake!"" The toad yells back, ""Naw man, you're in de-nile"""

"What did one testicle say to the other testicle? Don't talk to the guy in the middle. He is a dick!"

"What did the mathematician do when he was constipated? He worked it out with a pencil"

"What do you get when you combine mayonnaise and bologne? Bolognese sauce"

"i told this girl at the bar that im kinda popular on twitter and she sighed for 17 minutes straight the bartender timed it"

"How many millennials does it take to screw in a light bulb? 100. 1 to do it, and 99 to stand around saying the old one was better."

"What do you call a Christian who fell down the stairs? A couple of steps closer to their final destination."

"Knock Knock Knock, knock. Who's there? Anee. Anee,who? Anee one you like!"

"My wife went to the East Indies for her holidays. Jakarta? No, she went by plane."

"""God is good all the time!"" Yeah. Not you though, Russ. You sucked for 55 frigging minutes."