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Joke of the Day

"Thanks to Bruce Jenner, they're changing the name of the male-to-female sex change surgery. They're now going to call it the Dick-Off-A-Lon."

"What's the difference between a reindeer, a knight and a cock? The knight is slaying dragons, the reindeer is draggin' sleighs."

"How did Jesus get his beach bod for the summer? Cross fit"

"It's gotta be nice being a mortician... People are always dying to meet you."

"What did Alan Rickman say when he stood over David Bowie's grave? Do you mind if I Slytherin?"

"Apparently ""cool story, bro"" is not an acceptable substitute for ""congratulations"" when your friend calls and tells you she's pregnant."

"Bird of peace? The dove Bird of war? The hawk Bird of true love? ..wait for it... .... The swallow *walks offstage"

"What's little,metal, and will ruin dinner A bullet in your face"

"Going to the middle east for Christmas Because Christmas is da bomb there... Came up that myself. I'll walk myself out..."

"When the blonde found out her toaster wasn't water proof, she was shocked. A man walked into a therapist office wearing nothing but shrink wrap. The therapist said, ""I can clearly see you're nuts"""