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Joke of the Day

"I will be with you always and forever, even during the rough times, until the day we die. -Herpes"

"I knew I was destined to be a psychologist not a magician... ...when I pulled a habit out of a rat."

"I feel bad I punched that guy, but he shouldn't get so close to my punching bag. I should stop leaving my punching bag by my office door."

"What's an ants favourite collectible item Antiques"

"007 then and now 007 then: Shaken not stirred. 007 now: Trimmed not shaved."

"Daisy: how are you Gatsby: great"

"I can see 4 years into the future 20/20 Vision"

"What's long, hard, and has cum in the middle of it? A cucumber."

"If April showers bring May flowers what do Mayflowers bring? Genocide."

"Erlich Bachman. This is you as a old mayn. I'm a ugly and dead, alone."