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Joke of the Day

"Ahhhh,,, At last, my wife has found something her butt does not look big in............... Walmart"

"What do you get when you mix human DNA with zebra DNA? Well, kicked out of the zoo for starters."

"What do you tell a hitchhiker with one leg? Hop in"

"Did you hear about the race between Cambodia and Burma? It was a Thai."

"A guy walks into a bar. He sees a pirate with a steering wheel in his pants. The guy asks ""Why do you have a steering wheel in your pants?"". The pirate says ""I don't know but its driving me nuts!""."

"RULE OF THUMB: If a movie trailer makes me mutter, ""No one wants to see that,"" then about 50-100 million people will want to see that."

"In Canada... ...you are more likely to be killed by a moose than a terror plot. Damn Mooselisms."

"My hand has never pumped so hard for a little squirt. Stupid empty soap bottle."

"The hostess said to sit wherever I want, but the couple at this table are giving each other weird looks and have totally stopped talking."

"How tall does the grass grow in Germany? Nein feet tall."