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Joke of the Day

"Horrible Crash ""Two pedestrians die in a horrible crash!"" Wow, they must've been walking pretty fucking fast."

"How many gears does a French battle tank have? Five. Four in reverse, and one in case the enemy is attacking from the rear."

"In the summer there's only so many clothes you can take off. On that note, please send bail money."

"I'm single by choice. Just not my choice."

"Why did George Washington leave office after his second term. He wanted to set a president."

"To those who want to join the conversation. Don't."

"Every once in a while someone comes along, and if you are really still they'll eventually go away."

"I once applied for a job to work as a blacksmith.... The blacksmith asked me if I'd ever shooed a horse. I said ""no, but I once told a donkey to piss off."""

"Joke of the year. /r/politics"

"I don't know why old people drive so slowly.. If you're 85 you should be driving 85, you ain't got much time left!"