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Joke of the Day

"Yo mamma is so ugly when she tried to join an ugly contest they said, ""Sorry, no professionals."""

"i just thought of a funny line to use in my old age ""when i am having trouble peeing, i look down, and tell my penis to stop being a dick, and get on with it."""

"Whats the most common work of fiction? The average persons resume"

"Apparently when a trainer asks you why you want to stay in shape and you answer ""revenge"" it will raise a couple eyebrows."

"Your pussy is in more danger than a seal during Shark Week."

"My Thai girlfriend says a small penis isn't a problem in a loving relationship... I still wish she didn't have one."

"What is the difference between a pregnant lady and a lightbulb? You can unscrew a lightbulb"

"Q:What should Iraq get for its air defense system? A:A refund."

"My colleague can no longer attend next week's seminar on innuendo... Now I have to fill her slot..."

"Guy calls 911... ...says, ""Help me, help me, my wife's having a baby!"" 911 Operator says, ""Ok, sir, remain calm, is this her first child?"" Guy says ""No, it's her fucking husband!"""